This was a response to an ad I placed on Craig’s List.  I don’t recall the content of the post that garnered this response, but I get the feeling that the content of the post didn’t matter to this guy.

Masturbate for me. Both hands. Both holes. Taste. Mourn loudly. Pee and drink. Force yourself to orgasm. Repeat 3 times.

Amazingly enough, we never scheduled a meeting.