Sometimes I respond to Craig’s List ads just because I’m bored.  I like giving people shit.  I look in the Casual Encounters or Strictly Platonic sections with the intent to hook up or find a friend, respectively, but sometimes I can’t resist fucking with people.
This character, Pop Angel (PA), had posted a rant about how much San Francisco sucks, not in the Rants and Raves section, but in either CE or SP.  I had to respond.  This is obviously a case of two people who should have had something, anything, better to do.  Any spelling, grammar, punctuation, etc., errors are the asswipe’s, not mine.
SSF:
There’s a chance you’re disillusioned with San Francisco because you judge people based on looks and clothing before you’ve talked to them.  You may also have trouble communicating with people since it’s obvious you have some spelling, grammar, punctuation, and capitalization issues.

If you hate it here so much, why not move?  Maybe New York City, which you hold up as the epitome of cities, would better suit you.

PA:

I don’t believe I’m delusioned one bit dear misguided fool.  The reason why everything comes across as superficial is because it has been projected to me that way.   I can only let someone show me how he or she wants to be perceived.  And it was shown to me that a man or a woman is truely judged according to the labels they wear and whatever status symbol applies in San Francisco.  Words should guide actions, but actions have proved otherwise and your words are misleading & dishonest.I have family and professional reasons for being in San Francisco.  It’s definately not the caliber of NYC, Chicago or even Boston.

SF is not a “world class city”.  It has to be a city first, and a city that caters to people.  SF is a scene, nothing more.  It’s a background, there’s not much going on.  The ball games at AT&T Battery park is the only time I see anyone in the Bay Area share in any kind of cheer, and that’s a stretch.

And is it any deal that I mistype something if I’m speaking to others?

A friend from NY can rap off a funny story inspired by Spitzer, another gal from Boston and I can crack jokes about birds, a gawky kid from Ohio can become a stud in his own right because he has something one might call “social skills” and can hold your attention longer than five minutes, someone from India and I can rap about the currencies in Asia

Get a Bay Arean — and from grown ups all you hear is, “I dress my kids in Zac Posen” (“I have no reason for living”), “…Marc Jacobs” (“I’m needy”), “my kids go to school at…(“I’m shopping at Ross and I live vicariously through my child for status quo”),
“I live in Blackrock” (“I need approval”), “I have a trust fund” (I say that I don’t trust you), and “I go to Tahoe on the weekends” (it really means, “I’m insecure enough to throw away my equity loan because I have to buy my friends”).   You can smell the insecurity if you walk into a shop to get a pair of socks by some idiot hipster demi-god complex because they work in retail, and you can smell the insecurity when any guy will snub an AVERAGE girl because he thinks average girls have a princess complex.  Again, insecure and he’s probably right.   When you hear an asian girl spout out about her trophy “husband”, again… she needs approval.   The self loathing/snobby self loathing boredom is sucking this city dry!

I refused to pay full price on anything I saw in Cow hollow today because I pity you fools.  It’s a recession, and EVERYBODY “has to have a pashmina”.  EVERYBODY IN SF FROM SAN FRANCISCO IS THAT PRETENTIOUS.  There’s more material in my thong than there is in a pashmina.  We’re in a recession.  Everybody and their grannies has to spend $50.00 for each pashmina.  They’re $75.00 EACH if you walk into a trendy European store in San Francisco.  My beautiful friends from Europe would not dare spend a fifth of that money in Euros on a stupid piece of junk, I mean pashmina.   But hey, things like that do happen when people are allowed to like themselves.   And speaking of recessions, why is a tanktop selling for over $100, a loaf of bread for $4.00 and gas for $4.00/gallon?  Is everyone here that greedy?   Even though I can afford a $100.00 for a stupid shirt, why do i want to pay $100 for it?  They’re all $100+.   I wouldn’t even expense that kind of cost on a company account.

Now we’re getting to the juice.  While taking the Muni home, I noticed a black guy getting off.  He is dressed down and his arm is in a sling.  He stumbles to get off.  People were rather snooty around him.  Mind you, we are on the Muni.  Not a limo.  Then I noticed a bracelet, the poor guy just got out of a hospital and had to take himself home.   I mean, here is someone who is having a very real experience and because he may in some way distracted a few “liberal” prudes from their trashy novels, I’m sorry it is a little obnoxious.   And no, I don’t live in or around the Marina but apparently “the Marina” is the way to be.

I was in a conversation between a pair of bay area natives.  They were having about the dryest conversation about rock climbing.  Every other word that they shared about this exciting activity was poised and calculated.  Extracurriculars are all work and no play.  I’m not going to last long here.

It’s a shame.  Why waste my pity on a sick man who found himself in the company of unfortunate, unfriendly hags?  I’ll pity you and the natives of San Francisco instead.

SSF:

Seems as though there’s a certain kind of San Franciscan you don’t like.  Not everyone who lives in this city, and I think you want this to include you, is like that.  You’re judging a whole population based on your not-too-scientific viewing of a portion of the whole.

Yes, I do believe spelling, punctuation, etc., are important when communicating in the written word. Words mean something and to spell a word incorrectly alters the meaning.  A comma can make or break a sentence.  When communicating via spoken word of course spelling and punctuation mean less, but I’d still have to ask for clarification if you said the word “pacific” instead of “specific,” for example.

You infantilize women in general and Asian women in particular by calling them “girls.”  Pashminas were in high demand roughly five years ago so I don’t know where the hell you’re shopping.  Finally, you must have a shit-ton of time on your hands for you to use it in such an unproductive manner.  Maybe some hobbies?  Might I suggest jogging?  San Francisco is a small city and it really is nice to see the various neighborhoods with fresh eyes.  Try wearing headphones so you don’t have to actually interact with the locals.

PA:

You’d be suprised but I do jog quite a bit.  I can get a lot done before most people get up.I’m basing my experience on reality.  You can’t get more scientific than that!  By the way, I see pashminas being sold everywhere.  I see them being worn everywhere.  I refuse to get one.  As I refuse to get an Ipod. I’ve explored newer neighborhoods and I’m running out.  Sorry I don’t think it should be necessary to venture into the Tenderloin or the Mission to see different than the enforced status quo of some homogenous kind.

And sorry if I offended you by “infantizing” women.  I fit exactly into that category.  To me, a true woman have a sense of character and self; regardless of her capabilities to spell.  The main group seems quite obsessed with their vanity with either looks or intellect (if that).

Sorry if that report on reality doesn’t fit into your delusions of utopia that you’re making San Francisco out to be.  To me, utopia is and of it’s people.  I find it to be a hollow, vacant and empty place.

Cheers!

SSF:

Wow!  You are judgmental and nutty.

Why should it be necessary for you to avoid the more interesting neighborhoods and then complain that the city isn’t interesting?

PA:

If you think gutter toilets are interesting, then you might want to realize that not everyone in the real world thinks like you.  YOU are judgemental and nutty for even insinuating people be intrigued when it’s normal to find it offensive.  Sorry, sometimes we have weak stomachs.  And even if we have strong stomachs as I sometimes do, these types of things offend me as well.It’s not something we can help.

You’re judging someone with a normal reaction and you’re calling me judgemental.  Wow, you’re not only judgemental but funny!

SSF:
You don’t think it’s judgmental to say it’s “normal” to find some things offensive?  Ever hear of cultural relativism?  You’ve got it, bad.  “Normal” is based on your upbringing, environment, etc.  You think everyone in the world thinks the same things are “normal”?  If so, you should maybe do some traveling.  Maybe leave San Francisco forever?

S-T-O-M-A-C-H-E-S

I’m still not sure if PA is a man or a woman.  I don’t really care.  I would love to run into this shithead in a bar, though I suspect we’d never be in the same place at the same time.  I LOVE San Francisco and while I appreciate some constructive criticism, PA’s bullshit hardly qualifies.  Ah, Craig’s List, how I love thee.  Thank you for connecting me to such a diverse class of folk.

I swear.  True story.